gitpod to ona

Reviewed-on: #1

src/content/blog/amor-fati.md

@@ -0,0 +1,25 @@
+---
+title: amor fati
+description: love of fate
+pubDate: Aug 25 2025
+---
+
+I am slowing coming to terms that I have little to no control of what will.
+
+The past few months were nothing short of surprises, good or bad. Through various twists and turns, fate took me to where I am now: living in a bustling city in a cozy flat, while having a  fulfilling job in an environment where I can thrive and grow. Look back at the windy path behind me: puddles of tears I shed, stench of sweats that ran down from me, trails of blood from all the injuries that I endured. It is true: the only way out was through, and Fate was my navigator.
+
+At times, I hated them. I could not understand why they would take me through such a strenuous path. Every moment of disappointments, exhaustions and heartbreaks felt like a dead end, and it would make me question whether Fate was sabotaging me. Fate is a patient one, however. Despite my doubts, they remained undeterred, and fought through all the troubles together.
+
+Eventually, we saw light. The light came from a peaceful sanctuary where fellow travellers rest and heal before they move on. Before we could enter, Fate said:
+
+"Before we could enter, you must give up something that is dear to you. What you give up changes the path that the Sanctuary leads you. I get to decide what it is, but you can trus that I will make the best decision for you."
+
+Before I could open my mouth, Fate did it. They put their hands straight through my chest, and ripped away my heart. They placed it on the alter before the Sanctuary. The gates slowly widened as my heart evaporated into thin air.
+
+Now, Fate and I are in the Sanctuary. I am healing from the missing heart that was forcefully ripped away and from the damages I took from the journey to here. I finally get to settle down and rest.
+
+"We are slightly closer to the top of the mountain now." Fate told me, "enjoy your rest - you deserved it."
+
+"Where are we going next?" I asked, to which they replied, "to your destination."
+
+Fate is mysterious. Fate is unforgiving. Fate is also loyal, and only Fate knows the way. Tell Fate where you want to go, fight by them, and Fate will bring you there.

src/content/blog/fear-of-falling-behind.md

@@ -0,0 +1,13 @@
+---
+title: Fear of Falling Behind
+description: The looming pressure of keeping up with everything
+pubDate: Aug 25 2025
+---
+
+I am lucky enough to be in an [environment](https://kennethnym.com/blog/your-environment-dictates-everything/) where I am surrounded by bright-minded, high-achieving people that are doing incredible work every day, and they are nothing short of inspiring. Safe to say - I am the dumbest person in the room. On one hand, I get to learn from them every day, driving myself to get better. On the other, comparison inevitably arises within myself, and it has been slowly getting onto me recently: will I ever be good enough?
+
+There is always a looming pressure within me to work hard to prove myself to people; to prove that I belong in the room; to prove that I am equally capable of brilliance. I always tell myself: if I ever slack off, I will fall behind, and I will be vacated from the room of smarts.
+
+Truthfully, no matter how hard I work, it will never feel enough. In the same vein that [validations](https://kennethnym.com/blog/the-pathological-desire-for-validation/) numb my insecurity and my wounds, working numbs the fear (which stems from my insecurity.) Neither makes the source of the problems go away. The answer to this is obvious: one should work not out of insecurity, but for the love of the game; for self-improvement; for themselves and **themselves only**.
+
+The problem now lies within addressing insecurities and wounds within each of us. For many, including myself, this is a life-long journey of self discovery: processing past events, learning from failures, powering through traumas, and sitting with discomforts. Regardless of what one does, always remember: symptom relieves are never the solution.

src/layouts/BlogPost.astro

@@ -35,7 +35,9 @@ const {
 		<Header />
 		<main class="py-10">
 			<article>
-				<div class="prose prose-lg dark:prose-invert">
+				<div
+					class="prose prose-lg dark:prose-invert prose-headings:text-ctp-text prose-headings:font-medium"
+				>
 					<div>
 						<div class="opacity-60">
 							<FormattedDate date={pubDate} />

src/pages/index.astro

@@ -26,7 +26,7 @@ const posts = (await getBlogs()).sort(
 			</header>
 			<main class="py-8">
 				<p>
-					software engineer @ <Link href="https://www.gitpod.io">gitpod</Link>.
+					software engineer @ <Link href="https://ona.com">ona</Link>.
 					all opinions are my own.
 				</p>
 				<p>check out <Link href="/read">the books I am reading!</Link></p>
@@ -70,7 +70,7 @@ const posts = (await getBlogs()).sort(
 			<main
 				class="py-8 px-4 max-w-4xl flex flex-col items-center space-y-0 leading-tight"
 			>
-				<header class="font-bold text-center">KENNETHNYM v23.5</header>
+				<header class="font-bold text-center">KENNETHNYM v23.9</header>
 				<p class="leading-none">&nbsp;</p>
 				<p class="text-center">
 					software engineer @ <Link href="https://www.gitpod.io">gitpod</Link>.